PAIN

It hurts. It hurts a lot. It hurts because of not having someone who would care for you as no other person and what you probably truly deserve. It hurts from the thought of being afraid of doing an arrange marriage. It hurts when you see two people so in love with each other and you will be reminded of that you are still alone. Still devoided of the feelings they are experiencing. Or when you are with a couple who cares for you but then again not paying attention to you as they need to be with each other.
It hurts when you loose someone without knowing what could have been if you would have told them about how you feel. It hurts to see yourself so desperate for that someone special that you start seeing yourself in every other individual in your surrounding. It hurts not to be noticed, not to be recognised. And it even hurts more when you are not able to sumup enough guts to go to someone and talk to them, just normally,even when you wanted to so badly.
I don’t know how to relieve this pain. Whom to share with. How to get over it. I know I smile daily, but that smile won’t mean anything. It is fake, a total fake. It only symbolises failure. But I smile again next day, in order to remind myself that there is still hope for you. This is not the end. So keep smiling.